Tag Archives: empowered women writing

Christine Ristaino – Overcoming Violence

In September 2007, Christine Ristaino was attacked in a store parking lot while her three- and five-year-old children watched. In her upcoming memoir, All the Silent Spaces (She Writes Press, July 9, 2019), Ristaino shares what it felt like to be an ordinary person confronted with an extraordinary event―a woman trying to deal with acute trauma even as she went on with her everyday life, working at a university and parenting two children with her husband.

All the silent spaces book coverIn her book, Ristaino not only narrates how this event changed her but also tells how looking at the event through both the reactions of her community and her own sensibility allowed her to finally face two other violent episodes she had previously experienced. As new memories surfaced after the attack, it took everything in Ristaino’s power to not let catastrophe unravel the precarious threads holding everything together.  Moving between the greater issues associated with violence and the personal voyage of overcoming grief, All the Silent Spaces is about letting go of what you think you know in order to rebuild.

Here are some questions I had for Christine about her book, her process, and what is important to her.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

I would tell my younger self to listen to my body, my heart, my head, all of them, and see what my internal voice is telling me. So many times I focused outwardly on what others wanted. Now that I hear my own voice, everything is different. I speak from a place of power and I say what I feel, not what others want me to say. I would tell my younger self to ask herself what is important to her. I would tell my younger self that her story is important, that it is worth telling.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

Yes, I have always loved writing. I realized I could write well when a teacher told me to send a story into a competition in High School. Something clicked for me then. I began writing stories and poems in my teens and twenties, a dissertation and an academic publication in my thirties, OpEds and All the Silent Spaces in my 40s and early 50s.

Who is your favorite character in your book?

Since my book is a memoir, I would have to say that the older me, at the end of my book, is my favorite character. The book is about trying to find one’s voice after sexual assault. The experience of finding it through writing was the most powerful experience I’ve ever had in my life and I enjoy seeing a much more settled, imperfect but self-aware woman, ready to change the world, at the end of my book.

Where do you do most of your writing?

I do most of my writing at my kitchen table in the middle of the night or in my car on the side of the road in random places.

What inspires you?

Other people’s stories about overcoming obstacles inspire me.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

Christine Ristaino author photoIn addition to raising socially-conscious children, it has become my life’s goal to make sure survivors of violence don’t lose their voices.  Since I began writing my book, I have published articles in the Guardian, the Washington Post, the Huffington Post, Pacific Standard, and the Atlanta Journal Constitution about different aspects of my experience with violence and difficult conversations. Last January, I told my story to more than 6,000 people at the women’s march in Roanoke, VA.  Modeling how to have these conversations through my book will help more women gain the courage to say #MeToo, as well as inspire people to bear witness to the stories of those who have survived traumatic events. I would like to be a strong voice in the fight to change the discourse around violence.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

I’m a pantser.  I let whatever needs to come out, come out. When I was writing my book, I felt this incredible need to write it. I just went where it took me. Ultimately, through writing, I was able to look at two experiences with sexual violence that had happened to me as a child and young adult. Writing about these two events liberated me, helped me figure out who I really was.

What are you reading right now?

I’m teaching an Italian memoir class right now and I am reading my students’ short memoir pieces. They are powerful, honest, stunning! My favorite pieces arise from the prompts “This is who I am” and “Immigrant Story”.

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

I would visit my younger self and help out with the kids—allow her to have some down time and tell her how much I loved her. I would give her space to face the hidden realities that are preventing her from owning her voice. Of course, it would be fun to see my children at younger ages again, but I would miss their older selves if I spent too much time away from them.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

I would like Julianna Margulies to play me.

What are your top 3 favorite books?

The Warmth of Other Suns by Isabel Wilkerson, Snow Falling on Cedars by David Guterson, and The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

Usually I think of something and write it down as soon as I can pull over the car or get out of bed. Mostly I think of things to write about in the middle of the night or when I’m in the car. These two times of the day are the only moments where life quiets down for a spell and I feel creative and relaxed.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

I teach Italian, advise three super-empowered student groups at Emory, write OpEds, nonfiction, articles, spend time with my husband and children, have coffee or meals with family, students and friends, laugh, connect, exchange stories, love.

More about Christine:

Christine Ristaino teaches Italian classes at Emory University. She has co-authored an academic publication entitled Lucrezia Marinella and the “Querelle des Femmes” in Seventeenth-Century Italy through Farleigh Dickinson Press as well as the first edition of a book series called The Italian Virtual Class, which teaches language through cultural acquisition. She writes and publishes articles, essays, OpEds, and non-fiction, and presents her work in various forums throughout the U.S. and abroad. Ristaino recently completed her memoir entitled All the Silent Spaces, which confronts the topics of violence and discrimination.

Ristaino specializes in Italian pedagogy, languages, teacher training, service learning, and education.  She serves on various boards and committees and participates in efforts around social justice, race, class, education reform, and violence prevention.  Ristaino is an award-winning advisor and teacher and has experience organizing powerful symposiums, seminars, conferences and events. She leads workshops on the topics of diversity, equity and inclusion, privilege, writing and talking about difficult topics, and creating a public voice.

Ristaino mentors and advises three student groups and is a well-known, beloved faculty member. She is currently teaching a course about Italian memoir where her students share powerful memoir pieces about identity and overcoming obstacles.

Connect with Christine:
Here is where you can preorder Christine’s book:

 

 

Beth Ricanati – Baking and Breaking Bread

Beth Ricanati, wellness author

 

Author Beth Ricanati, MD, has built her career bringing wellness into everyday life, especially for busy moms juggling careers and children. She trained and worked at Columbia Presbyterian Hospital in New York City and at the Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio.  She now resides in Santa Monica, California.

I’m excited to bring you this fabulous interview with Beth Ricanati. Beth shares with us her philosophies and ideas about the importance of ritual, and finding your own kind of peace with her newly released memoir,  Braided: A Journey of a Thousand Challahs published by She Writes Press in September, 2018.
What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

Braided: A Journey of a Thousand Challahs chronicles my journey from a stressed out, overwhelmed physician-mother to one who has found a way to slow down through the weekly ritual of making challah. Braided is part memoir, part cookbook and part how-to guide.

What are you working on now?

I have thrown myself into publicizing the book, including participating in many events that often involved making challah, demonstrating making challah or braiding challah while also discussing the themes of the book. I am continuing to see patients in clinic as well, and have just realized that I may have another book idea to explore!

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Writing a book is serious business! It can be a lonely endeavor, in contrast to the effort required to publicize the book once it’s published. Surrounding yourself with people who understand what all of this entails is critical – not only will they be supportive, but the knowledge that they bring is invaluable.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I have always written, but I did not identify as a ‘writer’ until just before I decided to write this book. Rather, I identified as a physician and a mother, even though I was writing short-form pieces – mostly health and wellness-related – for a while before this! Once I committed to this project, I realized how beneficial it was to me personally to add the moniker ‘writer’ to how I self-identified; it legitimized what I had begun to do.

Where do you do most of your writing?

One of my favorite writers since college is Virginia Woolf and I have taken her advice to heart to have a room of one’s own! I write in a beautiful office with a large window that I frequently look out of.

Book Cover BraidedWhat inspires you?

I realized after making challah weekly for five years that this meaningful ritual had taught me so many lessons; moreover, I realized that not only was I probably not the only stressed and overwhelmed person on the block and if these lessons could help me, then they could probably help someone else and hence I began to figure out how to share the story.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I still make challah every Friday, sometimes by myself and sometimes with others – some of whom I have just met that day. Having a meaningful ritual is so important in today’s crazy world and I love to share mine with others in the hopes that they too will see the benefits!

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

I work best with structure and deadlines. I am always thinking of things and jotting notes everywhere, but when it comes time to write, I like to carve out time and get organized at my desk with my computer and a cup of tea, and often some music.

What are you reading right now?

I am just diving into both Annie Lamott’s new book, Almost Everything: Notes on Hope, and Andre Agassi’s autobiography, Open. I just finished Tayari Jones’ An American Marriage and Luis Alberto Urrea’s The House of Broken Angels. I love to read and have books stashed everywhere, including in the car in case I’m stuck in traffic!

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

What a fun question! Perhaps Marin Hinkle, who’s currently on “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”!

What are your top 3 favorite books?

An impossible question! Can I choose authors instead? I adore Virginia Woolf, Barbara Kingsolver and Dani Shapiro, to name just three.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

My space is very important to me: I like to have a clean desk! Tea and music help too.

Here is what people are saying about Braided:

“Ricanati’s memoir with recipes is a well-written investigation into her maturation as a doctor, her growth as a wife and mother, and the increasing wisdom she gained while pondering Jewish rites and rituals.” ~ Booklist, starred review

“Beth Ricanati has written a unique book: part recipe, part health, with a whole lot of soul. Reading her book is like making a new friend–you feel transported to her California kitchen. A yummy, cozy and inspiring read.” ~Lori Palatnik, author, media personality, and founding director of The Jewish Women’s Renaissance Project.

“This is not just a book about making bread. It is a book about making choices, and like a good challah is at times chewy, evocative, and a little sweet. Its wisdom transported me back to the kitchens of my grandmothers and the knowledge that in complicated times, the way forward is always the simple and beloved.”―David Baum, PhD, DMin, speaker, coach, conversation architect, and author of Lightning in a Bottle and The Randori Principles

Connect with Beth:
Buy her book:

Helen Zuman dishes about her book – Mating in Captivity

I am pleased to share with you this fascinating interview with Helen Zuman, the author of Mating in Captivity, a memoir that tells the story of Helen’s quest to find meaning in life and relationships that led her to Zendik Farm; a place that espoused a philosophy of saving the world from lies and corruption through art and harmony. What she came to realize was that Zendik Farm was something she hadn’t entirely expected.
Publisher: She Writes Press

Release date: May 8, 2018

book cover - Mating in CaptivityTell us about your book!

Mating in Captivity: A Memoir chronicles my five years, post-college, in a cult called Zendik Farm. When I moved to Zendik, at twenty-two, I was seeking meaning, belonging, and skills not taught in school; I had no idea I would gradually lose sovereignty over my time, energy, mind, and relationships—that is, surrender self-trust. In writing this book, I’ve both composted the stinky guck of my Zendik experience into fertile soul-soil and, I hope, enticed readers to turn their own piles.

What are you working on now?

I have a seasonal gig editing college application essays for an admissions consulting company; in the fall and early winter, that’s where most of my writing energy goes. However, I do write a monthly e-newsletter and blog post, and I spend five to ten minutes each morning engaging, through writing, in an effort to explore and transform my relationship with money.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Embrace the shitty first draft! Decide that the mission of your first draft is to be shitty, and that if you don’t make it shitty enough, you will have failed.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I’ve been writing since I was a kid, and the quality of my writing has always been extremely important to me. However, what made me a writer, and an author, was my determination to share the full tangle of my Zendik experience with readers who knew nothing about it. It was the book project that compelled me to establish and keep faith with a regular writing practice, and accept writing as a process. It kept asking me to learn more, travel further—and I kept saying yes.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

My current favorite is Owen, who pops up to deliver some shocking news to the protagonist, then fades out. I like his peculiar blend of whimsy and mysticism.

Where do you do most of your writing?

At my desk, in a nook in the living room of the one-bedroom apartment I share with my husband in Beacon, New York.

What inspires you?

Crisis. Magic. Things that disturb me deeply, or strike me as miraculous. I’m also inspired by delicious writing—in particular, the word-feasts cooked up by my dear friend Nina Kang.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I see my book, my other writing projects, and my book-related events as shuttles with which to weave and reweave the web of relationships, i.e., the fabric that both holds and comprises all life. Each connection made, each book read, each story shared is one more thread in the web.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

Since my book is a memoir, I knew the basics of my story before I started writing it. However, I did make many rounds of decisions, over the years, about what belonged and didn’t—and chose, eventually, to focus on my development as a sexual being and my quest for a partner. Those two threads became the spine of the book.

What are you reading right now?

Writing Down Your Soul, by Janet Conner. It’s a guide to getting in touch with, and listening to, one’s inner wisdom, while connecting with the infinite knowing of the larger whole. Also, I just finished two books by Ursula LeGuin—The Left Hand of Darkness and The Dispossessed—that seem to be grappling with big questions close to my heart: Is it possible to create a culture without money or overlords, in which everyone cares for everyone else? Is it inevitable that any pathology a group roots out will eventually be replaced by a new one?

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

Wulf—the male half of Zendik’s founding couple, whom I never met. I would ask him questions, or perhaps just listen to him ramble, in quest of a better understanding of his motives, his contradictions, his unsolvable knots.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

Reese Witherspoon.

What are your top 3 favorite books?

In order of appearance in my life: Bomb the Suburbs by William Upski Wimsatt. New and Selected Poems by Mary Oliver. Lost and Found: My Life in a Group Marriage Commune by Margaret Hollenbach.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

I make sure I have an adequate supply of homemade chocolate balls—also known as “crack”—on hand, so I can bribe/reward myself with one ball per half hour of thought-work.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

I like engaging in nourishing conversation driven by open, honest questions about things that matter. I like villaging—especially at Earthaven, an off-grid intentional community in Black Mountain, North Carolina. I like growing food with as little effort as possible. I like singing, writing songs, writing skits, inciting laughter. And I like walking—if not for my quota of six miles per day, I would be a cyborg.

Photo Helen ZumanMore About Helen:
Helen Zuman, author and witch, turns waste into food and the stinky guck of experience into fertile, fragrant prose. A graduate of Harvard College, she lives with her husband in Beacon, NY and at Earthaven Ecovillage in Black Mountain, NC. Mating in Captivity (She Writes Press 2018) is her first book.
More about Mating in Captivity:

When recent Harvard grad Helen Zuman moved to Zendik Farm in 1999, she was thrilled to discover that the Zendiks used go-betweens to arrange sexual assignations, or “dates,” in cozy shacks just big enough for a double bed and a nightstand. Here, it seemed, she could learn an honest version of the mating dance and form a union free of “Deathculture” lies. No one spoke the truth: Arol, the Farm’s matriarch, crushed any love that threatened her hold on her followers’ hearts. An intimate look at a transformative cult journey, Mating in Captivity shows how stories can trap us and free us, how miracles rise out of crisis, how coercion feeds on forsaken self-trust.

Read Helen’s blog:
helenzuman.com.
Buy her book!

http://helenzuman.com/signed-copies/, https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781631523373, https://www.amazon.com/Mating-Captivity-Memoir-Helen-Zuman/dp/1631523376/

The River by Starlight – Author Interview with Ellen Notbohm

This fall, I had the great pleasure of meeting award-winning author, Ellen Notbohm, a fellow author in the She Write Press/Spark Press family. I am so pleased to share with you this interview about her latest release, The River by Starlight, a story inspired by her research into the secrets of her own family history.
What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

book cover The River by Starlight The River by Starlightcame about when I hit what genealogists call a brick wall in our research. Every family has one—it’s the person no one will talk about, and there’s always an aura of taboo swirling around that brick wall. The River by Starlightis the story of the woman I found behind my family’s brick wall, a story that took years of painstaking research to bring into the light. It’s literary historical fiction based on the true story of a couple whose passionate union and entrepreneurial success unravels in the face of little-understood perinatal and postpartum illness. Though set a century ago, the themes remain eerily and unsettlingly resonant today: the stigma of mental illness, the inadequacy of mental health care, stark gender inequity, climate disaster, ruinous real estate boom-and-bust. Maternal mental health is a subject rarely addressed in historical fiction, the undertold story of many women, but Riveralso plumbs the depths of a male point of view, a story even less told.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Don’t find reasons not to write. I once confronted a profound question (I think it was from Oprah) that changed my life: What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? When I read that question to my husband in a shaking voice, he said, “Well?” and I answered, I would write a book. And he said again, “Well?” And here I am, five books later, all of them award-winners.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I always enjoyed writing and found ways to incorporate it into most of my so-called day jobs through the years. I believe that if one writes, one is a writer, so I had no sense of actually deciding to become a writer, I simply was one. The leap of faith was from writing articles and other short-form pieces to writing books, and then from writing nonfiction books to writing a novel. In the twilight zone between finishing the novel and getting it published, I wavered. I’d written a novel, so was I a novelist even though it wasn’t yet published? Could I take my own advice and say yes, I am a novelist? I struggled with that, but not for long, and then identifying my choices for the rest of the journey to publication became a bit clearer.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

My mother always declared how lucky she was, that her children were so different from one and another, it meant that each could be her favorite in their own unique way. That’s proven true of my characters in The River by Starlight, many of whom I love, but in very disparate ways. And of course there are a few villains I and my readers don’t love. One of my favorite reviewer comments: “The characters are real and pop off the page. I have empathy, sorrow, joy, and want to choke a number of them!!”

Where do you do most of your writing?

I have two writing rooms—the room I’m supposed to write in, and the room I actually write in.

Ellen Notbohm photoMy office is spacious but always hopelessly cluttered with the business end of writing and other ongoing aspects of life. I work in my office many hours a day, but it’s not my writing room. I write in the pre-dawn hours, in a bedroom done in dark reds, a few feet from my office. Wee-hours chilly mornings are my best writing time. The red tones of the room feel life-sustaining, suggestive of bloodlines, carrying a sense of history. The multi-media artwork on the walls is a four-generation history continuum too, from watercolors by my husband’s grandmother to needlework by me and a quilt by a good friend, to a painting by one of my children. A writing room needs a live element too—here it’s a feisty old cat, dozing in a dappled knot, a true survivor who fell out of a 150-foot tree in a city park, stumbled into our yard, and never left. Quite a story. Maybe my first children’s book?

What inspires you?

People who continue to exemplify love, grace, humility, generosity, respect, and optimism even in the face of adversity, injustice, and hate. Many of these people are children. We have much to learn from them.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

That I’m still a work-in-progress and I hope that never changes.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

The process is different for fiction vs nonfiction. I wrote my four nonfiction books from what I knew, gathering more “know” as I went along through the years, interacted with more people both peers and professionals. For my novel, the process was the opposite. I had the nugget of a good idea, then I went far and wide to research—fifteen states and provinces—and the arc of the story grew from there. I’d say I’m more of a pantser than a plotter. I seem to pull forth material that’s more raw, more organic, more emotionally nuanced when I’m pantsing. Plotting and structure are necessary to any book, but for me it comes later in the process when I see the general path the material is taking.

What are you reading right now?

Susan Henderson’s The Flicker of Old Dreams and Carrie La Seur’s The Weight of an Infinite Sky. We recently shared a panel discussion at the Montana Book Festival, discussing our books’ similarities in theme, one of which was how women who don’t fit easily into their communities find their place and their power.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

Someone we don’t know yet. Just as there are thousands of extraordinary writers whose work never gets the opportunity to come before the public, so are there actors whose exceptional talents go undiscovered. I’ve deeply appreciated the many people over the years who read my books even though I wasn’t famous, and told me in the most heartfelt terms how it had changed their lives. That’s the kind of actor I’d want to see play Annie. Someone who comes before viewers with no preconceived “Oh, I loved/didn’t love her in ______” notions, or “I liked her better in _______.”

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

The ritual is—no ritual. Since my best writing is done in the dark before anything else happens in the day, the act of getting up with intention and anticipation seems to be all the ritual I need. In general, I find that rituals bore me fairly quickly—that thin line between ritual and rote—then the ritual becomes finding a new ritual, and I don’t find that enjoyable or productive.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

Like many writers, I spend time lamenting how the business end of writing takes up so much time! I also have caregiving responsibilities that require a chunk of me. Trying to maintain balance is always a challenge, but I try to stay away from screens when I’m not working, doing a lot of reading, knitting, walking, cemetery prowling (great sources of story ideas), DIY projects. I love beach-combing and day-tripping to places that, even after a lifetime of living here, I have yet to discover. All of this eventually feeds the muse. And that muse is the ultimate renewable resource.

More about Ellen:

An internationally renowned author, Ellen Notbohm’s work has informed and delighted millions in more than twenty languages. Her books include her multiple award-winning  historical novel The River by Starlight, and the widely beloved Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew, a bestseller for over a decade. In addition to her other popular books on autism, her articles and posts on such diverse subjects as history, genealogy, baseball, writing and community affairs have appeared in major publications and captured audiences on every continent.

More about The River by Starlight:

Set in the waning years of Montana’s homestead period, Annie and Adam Fielding’s dreams of prosperity and family shatter as an enigmatic illness of mind and body plagues Annie’s pregnancies and exacts a terrible price. Based on a true story researched across fifteen states and provinces, The River by Starlightweaves a sweeping tale of passionate love, unthinkable loss, resilience and redemption embodied in one woman’s tenacious quest for self-determination in the face of devastating misfortune and social injustice. Its themes of maternal mental health, gender inequity, climate disaster, and economic boom-and-bust remain powerfully and painfully relevant today.

Here’s what reviewers say about The River by Starlight:

“Magical storytelling . . . intimate and poetic language reminiscent of Paulette Jiles and Marisa de los Santos.”  ~Booklist

“Graceful and unflinching.” ~Kirkus Reviews

“Captivating . . . exquisite.”  ~Foreword Reviews

“As rich in theme and detail as the Montana sky is in stars . . . impressive. ~Brian Juenemann, Pacific Northwest Booksellers Association

“Really well done. Don’t miss this.” ~Powell’s City of Books Staff Pick

Connect with Ellen:

Website           https://ellennotbohm.com/

Facebook         Ellen Notbohm, Author  https://www.facebook.com/ellennotbohm/

Twitter            @EllenNotbohm   https://twitter.com/EllenNotbohm

LinkedIn          Ellen Notbohm   https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellennotbohm/

Pinterest          Ellen Notbohm   https://www.pinterest.com/EllenNotbohm

Buy Ellen’s book:

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/River-Starlight-Novel-Ellen-Notbohm/dp/163152335X/

IndieBound: https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781631523359

Powell’s:  https://www.powells.com/book/-9781631523359

Barnes and Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/river-by-starlight-ellen-notbohm/1126894130

 

Things Unsaid – Author Interview with Diana Paul

I am so excited to share with you my interview with Diana Paul. Her book, Things Unsaid, released in 2015 by She Writes Press, explores the dynamics and emotional landscape of caring for elderly parents, while trying to navigate life’s other plans.

Book cover Things Unsaid

 

What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

My debut novel, Things Unsaid, was released exactly three years ago and focuses on the sandwich generation:  what to do with aging parents who are driving you crazy?  Conversely, for the elderly, will their adult children be willing to contribute to their caregiving financially, emotionally, and physically? This could be about anyone’s family.

Inspired by a true story – Jules Foster, a Stanford child psychologist, after hearing news of her estranged, narcissistic mother’s terminal diagnosis, chooses to care for her mother over her own addicted daughter.

What are you working on now?

I have two novels in the pipeline–one is a rom-com about online dating .  The other is a mystery that continues where my debut novel, Things Unsaid,  leaves off, turning an ambiguous subplot into a possible murder.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Stay with your dream of being a writer, even if that means only writing for yourself.  My advice would draw attention to the fact that you will be  surprised by how much you enjoy meeting others along the way in your writing/reading adventure.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I have always been a scribbler and writer, from elementary school on.  I wrote stories for the school and college newspapers, academic books on Buddhism (my graduate school specialty), and then finally turned my energies to fiction.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

All the characters, of course, have part of my psyche but my favorites are the protagonist, Jules Foster, who is deeply flawed, and her daughter, Zoe, who has to contend with her own crisis.  I had fun with Courtney in the online dating novel as well.  She’s hilarious and also vulnerable.

Where do you do most of your writing?

If the weather is nice, I like to write on the deck with my laptop.  Otherwise, at my desk.

What inspires you?

Almost everyone has a story, and I love hearing what others have experienced. Sometimes, I will even record what a friend says with her/his permission, of course.  Movies and television series also have great writing. The structure and character arcs of the best screenwriting never cease to inspire my own writing.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

That I meditate every day as a way to bring a clear mind to the writing process and to unwind and let thoughts just surface.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

I usually start with an outline, so that makes me a “mini-plotter”. But the story and characters evolve in a way that surprises me so I become a “pantser” as well.

What are you reading right now?

I haven’t read mysteries in a very long time, but since I’ve just finished the manuscript for one, I decided to pick up the genre again.   I’m enjoying reading The Suspect by John Lescroart, featuring a female attorney as the protagonist.

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

I’d either sketch or paint with Jules, the protagonist in Things Unsaid.  Or, I’d attend university classes with her daughter, Zoe.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

I always thought that Kate Winslet, Reese Witherspoon, or Naomi Watts would make a great Jules Foster who is on the cusp of fifty years old.  For the narcissistic matriarch I would go for Meryl Streep, Glenn Close, or Melissa Leo.  I kept these actors in mind when working on Things Unsaid.

What are your top 3 favorite books?

A Japanese Lover by Isabel Allende,  Mrs. Bridge by Evan S. Connell, and A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

I meditate, then I review the previous day’s work.  And I also have to deal with our cat, Mao, jumping on the keyboard of my laptop.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

Creating mixed media art, gardening, and dancing.

More about Diana:

Diana PaulDiana Y. Paul was born in Akron, Ohio andhas a Ph.D. in Buddhist Studies from the University of Wisconsin-Madison and has a B.A. in both psychology and philosophy from  Northwestern University.  Diana is a former Stanford professor in Buddhism with a focus on the role of women.

Diana is also the author of three books on Buddhism, one of which has been translated into Japanese and German.  Her short stories have appeared in a number of literary journals. She lives in Carmel, CA with her husband and calico cat. Her  second novel, A Perfect Match, is  pending as well as a third, Deeds Undone, a mystery which continues the narrative in Things Unsaid. When not writing, Diana  creates mixed media art.  Her art has been in museums and galleries in California, Hawaii, and Japan.

More about Things Unsaid: 

Family is never easy to deal with, elderly family is even more so.  Jules, a former university professor, has always played “the good daughter.” She and her husband Mike have set aside a college fund for their daughter Zoë, who is preparing to leave for Stanford. But when Jules’ parents lose everything in 2008’s Great Recession, she must make an impossible choice: her daughter’s future or her dying parents.

Things Unsaid is an award-winning novel: a 2016  USA Best Book Awards Finalist in two categories (Best New Fiction and Best Literary Fiction),  2016 Beverly Hills Book Awards Winner for Best New Adult Fiction, Readers Favorite Silver Award Winner for Best Drama, and a 2016 Pushcart Nominee.

“With a grace that is absorbing and deft, Paul tackles many difficult questions, including filial responsibility, depression, marital strife, and sexual identity. …The author depicts heart-wrenching conundrums as the three siblings are forced repeatedly to evaluate their personal priorities….An engaging tale of family dysfunction and intractable senior citizens.” ~Kirkus Review

Connect with Diana:

Visit Diana’s blog on movies and art at:  www.unhealedwound.com and her author website at: www.dianaypaul.com. Or stop by on Facebook, Twitter:  @DianaPaul10 and/or  Instagram: dianapaul10  and dianapaul4675

Buy Diana’s book:

https://www.amazon.com/Things-Unsaid-Diana-Y-Paul/dp/1631528122?  https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781631528125

Author Interview – Read about Kathryn Taylor

From loss and despair, Kathryn Taylor has learned how to live life to the fullest again. Today she shares with us the impetus for writing her memoir, Two Minus One. Her book will be released November 6, 2018 by She Writes Press. Thank you, Kathryn, for sharing your story of empowerment!

Kathryn Taylor - headshot

What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

Two Minus One: A Memoir

I had been divorced and was raising two daughters as a single, working mom. The three of us had carved out a life for ourselves and made our way in the world as a united entity without a male figurehead. We had grown strong in our relationship and independent in our lives. I had met with success in my career, my daughters were ready to move off to college, and I was content with my life and happy in my world.

Then I took a chance! The father of friends of my daughters was divorcing his wife. He had always been supportive of the three of us as a family unit and ready to help in any way that we needed. Over several years, it became clear that his intentions were evolving from friendship to relationship. I was adamant that was not what I wanted and had no interest in another man in my life. However, after years of hearing his repeated refrain, “You can quit waiting for the other shoe to drop: I’m in it for life,” I thought it might be true and worth taking a chance.

Those fateful, repeated words convinced me to remarry, retire from my thirty-year profession, sell my home, and relocate in support of my new husband’s career. We enjoyed an idyllic life committed to making our second marriages last a lifetime. We awoke each day in wonder and awe that we had grown children who were independent, no financial liabilities or elder care responsibilities, and enjoyed good health. But five years later, in a car packed with food I had carefully prepared to nourish my husband’s dying brother, the other shoe did drop. On a road trip, my loving husband unexpectedly proclaimed he was, “done with the marriage and doesn’t want to talk about it.”

I somehow survived the weekend with his family – convinced he didn’t mean a word he was saying, and that he was striking out over fear of his brother’s imminent death. However, on the return drive home, he made it clear that he was “fucking damn done,” that I was “mean and despicable,” and he, “has nothing more to say.” As the door closed behind him, so did my world. I remained on the sofa, with the shutters closed to block out the world that I knew could not go on without the life we had built.

I was completely distraught and debilitated. The man I had come to completely love and trust had walked away from the life we had worked so very hard to build – without any indication that anything had been wrong. We had routine “state of the union” discussions about our relationship and covered every topic from sex to travel to retirement. We had been building a strengthening relationship in a new environment and reported nothing but growth and increasing commitment in each of these meetings. Yet, now he was gone – and didn’t want to talk about it!

I was immobilized by grief. I was overcome with shame for what he said I had displayed in bad behavior towards him. I was certain that if he said I was mean and unworthy of love, it must indeed be true. I felt that if I had destroyed this wonderful man and our wonderful marriage, I certainly had nothing to offer to anyone else in the world and held no value whatsoever– for myself or for anyone else. I remained on that sofa for weeks – of which I am not proud to admit – blubbering, dripping snot, and unwilling to take or make phone calls or connect in any way with the outside world.

I felt a sense of shame that I had never experienced in my life and was certain that I was unworthy of anything that life offered. The unexpected betrayal – by the man I trusted and who had assured me that he loved me more than his next breath – was more than I could bear. Except for an occasional text, I terminated all outside communication with those I loved – and who I had once felt certain loved me.

Finally, I received a text from my very best friend. She stated that she would call me and expected me to pick up the phone. She did not care if I did nothing but sob, but she was going to connect. If I did not answer, she would send the police to my door to check on my welfare. Hesitant, I took the call and let the details tumble out. Days later, my friend arrived at my house.

Two Minus One coverI began relying on the strength of that lifelong friend who refused to let me succumb to the intense waves of grief. I gradually began to find my way out of the darkness that had become my life. Over the course of two years, through appointments with attorneys and therapists, purging shared belongings, and pushing myself to meet new people and do new things, I gradually regained a sense of control in my world. I slowly learned to enjoy the new life I began to build, the friendships I began to form―and to savor my triumphant outlook and new-found strength.

My book relates that personal journey from unexpected loss to triumphant new beginning. I believe it – and I – have a strong message that will benefit many others that are experiencing similar loss.

What are you working on now?

Marketing the book. I am in awe of authors who can write, blog, and market simultaneously!

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Never underestimate the demands of the publication/marketing process.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I had always dreamed of writing. I entered a writing contest at an early age and have always journaled. However, my “calling” at the age of six, was toward teaching and from there, life happened. I journaled continuously, and wrote report card comments, but did not attempt a “book” until the sudden termination of my marriage. The writing helped me heal and move on.

Where do you do most of your writing?

The beach when possible. Everywhere else in the house until it is actually time to use the computer, then in my office.

What inspires you?

The pain of my story was my inspiration. It was visceral, and I strove for understanding and clarity through my writing.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I have no training or experience in writing.  My story has taken on a life of its own. If someone out there believes they have a story to tell and to share, they should follow their dream – no matter their circumstance or age.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

I believe my process was different than most. I was writing my story in real time and working through some intense emotional pain. I wrote in journals, scribbled notes randomly and continuously, and compiled chapters and flow as the story appeared on the – handwritten – pages. I literally cut and pasted with scissors and glue, spreading my pages all over the house before I sat down at my desk with my laptop to put the story together. So, to answer your question, I would be called a pantser.

What are you reading right now?

Because I am so new at the entire publication and marketing process, I am certain it requires far more of my time than for most authors. Because of that, I read far less than I would like – and mostly when I do get away to the beach. Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng was a wonderful recent read.

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

If I could spend the day with my former spouse, I would question him as to his motives and feelings about leaving. I would love some answers and insights.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

That is an interesting question as when I spoke with my first therapist I asked her, “Who do you think should play me in this made for TV drama that I am living?” Her answer, “A woman with the utmost dignity.” I think Michelle Pfeiffer could pull it off!

What are your top 3 favorite books?

Anne Frank:Diary of a Young Girl– I was destined for memoir from an early age! She was so brave and never bitter in the worst of situations. Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh remains as timely as when it was written in 1955. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz: Be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, always do your best, and the newly added fifth agreement, remain skeptical but learn to listen.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

I light a scented candle, have a stress relief Wonder Woman bitsy, and I turn off my cell phone.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

I am happiest on the beach-any beach. When I cannot be on the beach, I love to be outdoors biking or taking long walks with my dog Lucy. I love to read and share time with dear friends and family.

Here is more about Kathryn:

Kathryn Taylor was born at the Great Lakes Naval Station near Chicago, Illinois and spent much of her life in the Chicagoland area. When she entered first grade, reading came easily to Taylor. Decades before terms such as “peer tutoring” and “collaborative learning” had been coined, her teacher had an inspiring idea. She would allow Kathryn to assist classmates struggling to decode those pesky letter combinations and help them learn to read. Taylor experienced an undeniable sense of fulfillment helping her classmates and licking gold stars onto completed pages. The desire to become a teacher took root.  Taylor enjoyed thirty years in the classroom and had taught in the schools of Illinois, California, and Virginia before her retirement and relocation to South Carolina. It was there where Taylor wrote her book, Two Minus One: A Memoirfollowing the unexpected abandonment by her second husband. Taylor is an avid reader, enthusiastic traveler, and incurable beach lover. She resides outside of Charleston, SC, with her rescue dog, Lucy, where she can enjoy all three of her favorite past times.

More about Two Minus One:

“You can quit waiting for the other shoe to drop, I’m in it for life.”

Those are the fateful, repeated words that help convince Kathryn Taylor to remarry, retire from her thirty-year profession, sell her home, and relocate in support of her new husband’s career. But five years later, the other shoe does drop when her husband, without any explanation, tells her he is done with the marriage.

Poignant and full of raw emotion, Two Minus One is Taylor’s story of loss and rebuilding, betrayal and friendship–and of recalling life on her own terms.

Connect with Kathryn:
Buy Kathryn’s book:

Author Interview – Betsy Graziani Fasbinder

This woman really loves life! I am so excited to share with you my interview with the vibrant Betsy Graziani Fasbinder. She has released three books with SheWrites Press and shares a little bit about all of them here. I’m certain you will enjoy learning about Betsy and her books!
Betsy Fasbinder

What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

My latest book is not a work of fiction, but a resource for writers. It’s called From Page to Stage: Inspiration, Tools, and Public Speaking Tips for Writers. I wrote it because I was once positively terrified to speak in front of groups. In fact, fear kept me from thinking of publishing my writing for many years, so terrified was I that if I actually published a book, I’d have to stand in front of people to talk about it. That seems absurd now, but it’s true.

 

I eventually got frustrated that I was letting fear of being in front of a group rob me of opportunities, both in my writing and in voicing my ideas, experiences, and viewpoints on matters about which I’m passionate. So, I sought training in public speaking, and I saw that a few simple skills, supportive coaching, and some practice could radically improve my ability to speak in public. I learned to manage my nerves and to speak in front of audiences of any size with confidence and skill in a way I could not have, at first, imagined. I want that for every writer, many of whom are either timid about speaking in public, perhaps as fearful as I was, or simply want to gather some skills to talk about their stories, their writing, and ideas they hold dear. This book is my version of a love gesture to writers and storytellers whose work has meant so much to me. I want every author to feel confident and bold when they’re talking about their writing and their ideas.

From stage to pagePrior to this book I published a book of fiction, Fire & Water and a memoir, Filling Her Shoes: A Memoir of an Inherited Family. Fire & Water is a dark love story about the link for some people between extreme creativity and madness, and about the painful experience of being in love with someone suffering profound mental illness.

What are you working on now?

I’m about halfway through my first draft of a new book of fiction. I’m happy to be back to fiction, my first love as both reader and writer. It’s fun to be back into the work of an imagined world. This new story keeps knocking on my mind…even coming to me in dreams. That’s when I know it’s a story that I must write.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

“Be braver sooner, you’re stronger than you know and living out loud is far more freeing than you’ll ever imagine.”

So many of my younger self’s fears kept me from pursuing all kinds of things, including publishing books. I was afraid of “living out loud”, telling both my lived and imagined stories, fearful of feeling exposed and conspicuous. What I’ve discovered is that in finding my voice, first on the page and now in my spoken work, that it’s incredibly freeing to rid myself of the burden of hiding. By first publishing, then talking about my writing, I’ve had the priviledge of encounters with readers who tell me that my stories made a difference to them, made them feel more understood or gave them insight into some aspect of human experience. This is the most deeply gratifying part of writing for me. I’d have missed out on all of that, were it not for writing and publishing stories.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

I recently recalled something funny regarding that. When I was about eleven, I read an author’s dedication to her mother in the front of the book. I decided at that moment that I’d someday write (though I didn’t imagine publishing, at all). So I took a piece of onion-skin paper, and in my eleven-year-old version of caligraphy I wrote a dedication to my mom of some future, imagined book I’d someday write. I stained the paper with tea to make it look old, burned the edges, and rolled it like a diploma, tying it with a black ribbon. This became my mom’s holiday present.

Later, practicality prevailed and I did other work to earn a living, but I always wrote privately.  I published my first book at age 54, sadly long after my mother had passed away. So I suppose this desire has been in me for a long time. I always wrote—stories, poems, journals—but only pursued publishing in my more mature years. I think I wanted to become a writer because stories mattered so much to me. They were not just entertainment, they were escape, inspiration, understsanding, and adventure. I wanted, and still want, to be able to provide that to others.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

It’s funny, I actually miss the characters in my novel, Fire & Water. They feel, even still, that real to me. A supporting character in the story in Fire & Water  is Mary K (short for Kowalski).  I may miss her the most. She’s a sassy, sometimes foul-mouthed, but an always truthful friend to Kate, the protagonist of the story. She’s fiercely loyal, brave, and also funny. Mary K became a surprising hero in the story—surprising to me, even! She’d be a girlfriend of mine in “real life” when actually, she’s a composite of many close women friends I’ve enjoyed in my life.

Where do you do most of your writing?

This is where I must confess a luxury. Six years ago, my husband and I moved to a modest mid-century ranch house. It’s a small, not a fancy place, but it does have a little cottage in the back yard, separate from the house. This has become my writing studio. I think of it as a little birdhouse, overlooking a scene of hills and trees in the distance. Honestly, I feel like a millionaire when I’m in that studio and am reminded of Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own. My earlier books were written in a open landing at the top of the stairs, with family members and pets running through constantly.  I have little excuse now not to get writing done–though I manage to find excuses, I’m afraid.

What inspires you?

Honesty. Honesty in personal life and in writing or any professional pursuit. This seems like a simple word, honesty, but it’s a complex virtue. It’s not simple truth-telling, it’s about being impecible in the pursuit of understanding and telling of truth. It’s about authenticity. It’s about setting aside biases and agendas. It’s about bravery. It’s integrity. A fictional story can be told with “honesty” because it tells a story with authenticity and not simply for commercial gain. It’s not manipulative of the readers nor a contrivance.

Memoirs and essays are one kind of truth-writing, but not the only kind. Sometimes the truest stories are told through fiction, though that may seem contradictory to some.  I recall as an adolescent reading A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, by Betty Smith. Though a work of fiction, it felt at that time like the “truest” thing I would ever read. I like what the author Pam Houston says, that everything she writes is true, and some of it actually happened.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I’m someone who loves sharing whatever I’ve learned, sometimes what I’ve just learned, with the next person right behind me trying to understand the same thing. This is true for those whom I coach as writers, as speakers, and in my role as a therapist, though of course that’s a different kind of sharing. Now in the final year of my fifties, I’ve finally determined what I want to do when I grow up. Throughout my various careers and roles, I’ve strived to communicate clearly in intimate conversations, public ones, and in my writing. I love helping others to do the same. This feels like my life’s purpose.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

I do tons of mental plotting of what I write in every genre, sometimes for many months, or even years.  I often have a mental image of the beginning, much of the middle, and the probable ending of a story or book, though that can change and evolve as I do the writing. I write reams of notes about my characters, search for photos of people whom I think they might resemble. But I don’t so much plot stories out on paper. Sometimes this causes me some pain because I write many pages—sometimes many chapters—that later get deleted from the final piece.  But I’ve tried to plot more formally, and for me, it takes the freshness out of the writing. My way is messier, but it works for me.

What are you reading right now?

In my few recreational reading moments, I’m reading Beautiful Illusion by Christie Nelson. It’s a gorgeous bit of historical fiction set in my own San Francisco. Most of my reading time is going toward the manuscripts of writers for whom I’m providing developmental writing coaching. It’s a delight, but not quite the same as simple pleasure reading.

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

Of course, I’d love to spend some real-life time with Mary K, whom I mentioned above. But I would also love to spend time with Jake Bloom, a more primary character in Fire & Water. He’s a brilliant artist and a passionate person. I’m sure he’d be a fascinating person, as long as he is not in his more treacherous cycle of his mental illness.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

I actually sent a copy of Fire & Water to Maggie Gyllenhaal because I thought she’d be a perfect person to play Dr. Katherine Murphy in Fire & Water. I’m sure she’s inundated with books, so I never got a response, but hey, a writer can try, right?

What are your top 3 favorite books?

This is tough. Of course, it might be tough to name just 300 favorite books. But okay…three.  I have to list John Steinbeck’s East of Eden for its sheer mastery. Pam Houston’s Sight Hound also comes top of mind. It is such a creative way to tell a story and she exposes with raw candor the “truth” that she and her characters uncover. And finally, I must say I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, by Maya Angelou is among my favorites. This book was so groundbreaking, telling a story both in its ideosycratic detail and its universal truth. This book changed the course of my life in profound ways.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

I have to confess that I’m a bit of a binge writer, so my writing “rituals” change all the time depending on what I’m writing and in what stage. But one practice holds me in good stead, regardless of what I’m writing. At the end of my writing time in a day, particularly when I’m feeling a little stuck about the next part of the story, I write what I call “dream seeds”.  Just before bed, I write questions to myself or even addressed to my characters about their choices, behaviors, background, etc. More often than not, my dream seed blossoms and I dream the answer to the question. Sometimes I dream of a plot point. At other times, I uncover a motivation of a character or a bit of their history I’d not yet imagined. I think these come to me in dreams because the distractions of the world are set aside during sleep.  Dreams are my main source of untangling the knots in my writing.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

Of course, I love books and I love going to author events, and even host a quarterly readers’ series. But beyond that, I am a bit of a movie nut, rarely going a week without going to the movies and now, there’s Netflix—both blessing and curse. And I love spending time with loved ones, sharing meals, playing cards, traveling together.

Connect with Betsy:
Facebook: BetsyGFAuthor
Twitter: @BetsyGFasbinder
Instagram: betsygrazianifasbinder
Here are some reviews of Betsy’s books:
 
From Page to Stage – “Fasbinder’s candid yet comforting delivery makes it feel as though she’s with readers every step of the way, offering a thumbs-up from teh back of the room. A lean, helpful primer for authors who want to succeed as speakers.” ~Kirkus Review
Filling Her Shoes:  “A beautiful and inspiring testament to the resilience and healing power of family.” ~Booklist Starred review
Fire & Water: “…Fasbinder takes the reader on a most compelling and satisfying ride, all the way to the final four words.” ~Sands Hall, Author of Tools of the Writer’s Craft
 
Buy Betsy’s books:
 From Page to Stage
Filling Her Shoes
Fire & Water
On Writing and Riding

On Writing and Riding – The Importance of Foundation

 

Writing is challenging endeavor—one that requires a little bit of natural talent and a whole lot of study and practice. The same holds true for natural horsemanship. As a practitioner of both disciplines, I have learned that both require a certain amount of physical stamina, but more importantly, an intellectual understanding of foundation—and that sometimes, we have to go back in order to move forward. We must have the courage to find the holes and gaps in our foundation in order to repair it, build upon it, and make it whole.

Achieving excellence in any art or discipline has its roots in a solid and sure foundation.

I first started studying natural horsemanship in 2012. Before then, I felt my knowledge and skills as a horsewoman were well above average. I’d had horses most of my life. I had good handling skills and decent riding skills. I felt I knew my horses’ quirks, their strengths and weaknesses. I found it easy to learn new disciplines and I did well at competition—until I didn’t. Suddenly, I hit a wall. Something was wrong. Something was missing. I wanted more from myself, more from my horses, and more from our performance.

Person on horseback

So, I turned to natural horsemanship. Once I started learning about the philosophy and psychology of natural horsemanship, I realized what was missing. I had holes and gaps in my foundation. I realized I knew little of what it is to be a good partner to my horses. I knew almost nothing about horse psychology—how a horse thinks, or feels, or learns. I also didn’t put into practice the idea that horses are individuals, and like humans, have their own unique set of personality traits, emotions, and skill sets that should be taken into account when training them or working with them. My knowledge, my practice, and my “feel” suddenly seemed so rudimentary.

Seeing the holes in my foundation was startling, humbling, and even a little dispiriting. It is never fun to find out you are deficient at something, especially something you are passionate about. Yet, recognizing my weaknesses only made me want to turn them into strengths. I had found a challenge. And, nothing excites me more than a challenge!

As Natural Dressage Instructor Karen Rohlf says in her book, Dressage Naturally … Results in Harmony, “to find holes in your foundation, it is a gift.” It is a gift because we get a chance to go back and make things right. To fill in the blanks. To make something whole. She further explains that we must continue to work on our foundation and constantly nurture it to help it grow. For only then do we reallyhave something to build upon.

Finding that my foundation with my horses was on shaky ground gave me pause, and also made me question the foundation of my other passion in life, writing. Could it be as unstable and incomplete as my equine passion? I suppose if one never looks, one never finds. So, look I did. And find I did. More holes.

There is nothing more cringe-worthy to me than the experience of reading some of my earlier works; manuscripts, or stories, or articles I’d written when I was younger and more inexperienced. Looking back at those pieces of writing made me want to give up. Who did I think I was fooling? How could I have been so misguided? How could all those English profs I admired be so misguided?

Once I got over the embarrassment of what I considered to be “good” writing, I found that I could also see in those past works little nuggets of natural skill, some wisdom in my innocence, and a whole lot of passion. Maybe the profs weren’t crazy, after all. It was enlightening to go back and see that younger, more inexperienced self. It showed me how far I’ve come and how far I still have yet to go. I can see the challenges ahead, and it lights a fire within me. I realized I want to be better at what I do. Always.

So I started to seek out mentors. People who are more experienced than I in both of my chosen disciplines. People who are have the experience and knowledge to spot the holes in my understanding, training, and natural set of abilities. People who are willing to share with me what I can do to repair or fill in those holes, to help me build, re-build, and strengthen my foundation.

Friends and family have often questioned why, in the past few years, I have attend so many writers’ conferences and workshops. They wonder why I spend so much time and expense, and sometimes travel away from home for extended periods of time, to work on my horsemanship. Haven’t I learned enough already? Don’t I already know and understand the basics? My answer is always, no. Not enough. There is never an end to learning, and the foundation of our training and knowledge is never as solid as we think it is. Things change, evolve and grow. The foundation beneath our feet is always shifting, and we have to keep up with it or lose our balance.

Going backward can sometime feel like a failure, or a punishment. But, if we look at it as part of the journey, as part of becoming more whole ourselves, as a person, it doesn’t seem so bad. I’ve learned that in order to move forward with anything in life, we often must take a few steps back. We need to revisit and confront our weaknesses, work on them, and challenge them to become a bigger part of the whole. This requires work, but the work doesn’t have to be painful. I like to think of it as adding more squares and shapes to a hand-made quilt. Sometimes we have to go back and repair some of the stitches that have worn over time, but it only makes the new patches we sew on all the more beautiful and bright.

It never hurts to go back to the beginning—especially with fresh eyes and a new perspective. After the last chapter is finished, it’s good to go back to the first chapter to see if the idea or story has circled back around, that the first part of the work has continuity with the last. When trying to learn or finesse a skill in the saddle, it’s good, and necessary—and only fair to the horse—to go back to the basics to check the foundation before asking him or her to learn and perfect something new.

Having patience with the process and with ourselves is never easy. But it can be well worth the sometimes difficult task of going backwards. If you’ve fallen out of love with what you do, or if you feel the urge to give up on your passions and dreams, or if you think you just can’t get any better at something, maybe it’s time to go back. Take a hard look at your foundation. Look for the holes. And when you find them, I hope you rise to the challenge to fill them in, add to the quilt, and become the writer, the equestrian, or the person you hope to be.

This post was first published in Writer’s Digest,  June 29, 2018

 

Quirky Stories for a Quirky World – Mindy Tarquini

Author Mindy Tarquini spends her time creating and crafting new worlds in which all things, good, evil, and quirky are possible.

Deepest Blue, Mindy T.

Today, author Mindy Tarquini tells us about her novel, Deepest Blue, published by Spark Press last month, and gives us a peek into her process and how pain brought her to writing. Here is what Publishers Weekly had to say about Tarquini’s newest release: “…a haunting lyrical fantasy dealing with love, loss, and political turmoil…”

Fans of Paulo Coehlo and Neil Gaiman will revel in this magical tale.

What was/is your latest book release? Tell us about it!

My latest release is Deepest Blue (Sparkpress 2018). The story is set in a fairytale land where everyone’s destinies are predetermined, until one young man decides to seek a life of his own.

What are you working on now?

I am leaving fairyland for a while to return to the county of humorous contemporary fiction. The story is set in Arizona, the time-traveling is sublime.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

Learn story structure, and use it. A great story needs a great structure or it is just a series of events.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

Mindy TarquiniNo, I have worn many hats. From restaurant to retail to accounting to allied healthcare, it wasn’t until I had my mom-hat on that I truly began to write. I hurt my back, which meant that there wasn’t much else to do except hang out on the internet and search the pain forums for ideas on how to alleviate the constant ache. I ended up chatting with someone who was a writer. She invited me to a writer’s forum where people exchanged stories. There, I made a couple of friends whom I still consider to be among my closest. We don’t exchange stories so much anymore, but we do love to laugh.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

Claudio from Deepest Blue. He’s a cleric, which makes him the man who knows everything but can’t say any of it.

Where do you do most of your writing?

At home with my dog. Punctuation makes her happy.

What inspires you?

The land of “what-if” inspires me. I see something, I go to the land of “what-if”, and all kinds of wondrous things happen.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I’m always breaking the rules that I set for my characters.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

Who actually likes wearing pants? As my daughter says, “comfy pants or bust”. As for writing- I’ve never met an outline that couldn’t be expanded.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

I used to sacrifice a blue bird or two, but the neighbors complained to the HOA.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

Plotting the next one. There’s no time once you get on this publishing rollercoaster. Like…none.

Read more about Deepest Blue.

In an enchanted city seen only at twilight, a resentful second son unlocks secrets which could cause his world’s star to finally set.

In Panduri, everyone’s path is mapped, everyone’s destiny decided, their lives charted at birth and steered by an unwavering star. Everyone has his place, and Matteo, second son of Panduri’s duca, is eager to take up his as Legendary Protector–at the border and out from under his father’s domineering thumb. Then Matteo’s older brother pulls rank and heads to the border in his stead, leaving Panduri’s orbit in a spiral and Matteo’s course on a skid. Forced to follow an unexpected path, resentful and raw, Matteo is determined to rise, to pursue the one future Panduri’s star can never chart: a life of his own.

Brigadoon meets Pippin in this quirky tale of grief steeped deep in Italian folklore and shimmering with hope–to remember what helps, forget what hurts, and give what remains permission to soar.

More about Mindy!
Mindy Tarquini grew up convinced that there are other worlds just one giant step to the left of where she’s standing. Author of the critically acclaimed and award-winning Hindsight (SparkPress 2016) and The Infinite Now(SparkPress 2017), Tarquini’s writing has appeared in Writer’s Digest, BookPage, Hypable, and other venues. An associate editor on the Lascaux Review and a member of the Perley Station Writers Colony, Tarquini is a second-generation Italian American who believes words have power. She plies hers to the best of her ability from an enchanted tower a giant step left in the great Southwest.
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Author Interview – Rachael Sparks

I am so excited to share with you my interview with fellow Spark Press author, Rachael Sparks! She is here to talk about her debut novel Resistant, to be released October 16, 2018. Mark your calendars, you won’t want to miss this one!

Tell us about your novel

Resistant, imagines a world post-antibiotics, which is truly almost upon us. The main character is a woman who has lost her mother to an infection and is getting by with her father but discovers she might hold the cure in her own blood. Because of that, she’s a target of several groups that would like to control that cure. She’s unsure whom to trust and still trying to protect her friends and family while she determines the real answer, and the adventure takes off from there. It’s a little bit sci-fi, adventure, action and romance, so I think it’s going to appeal to many readers.

What are you working on now?

I’m working on the publicity steps for Resistant, which releases in mid October. I’m also finishing a work in progress that I love working on. It’s set in 1700s Maine and the present day, with just a dash of science, a pinch of witch, and romance threading through two stories. The two main characters are distant relatives and I’ve really come to adore learning about them—and about lighthouses, Maine, and medicine in colonial Americas.

What advice would you give to your younger writing self?

I’m certain I was quite a terrible writer in my youth, but I was just writing fun tales for myself. Later in my early 30s, better stories came to me but I wasn’t confident enough to write them. If I could advise younger Rachael, I would say to start practicing and writing down those tales stuck in my brain. It took the confidence of age for me to begin writing seriously, but also the experiences and exposure to different styles of writing. It even took exposure to some poor, yet published, writing that gave me a sense of “Well. If they can, I can.” So maybe I would just buy her a drink, wink, and tell her she’s capable of more than she knows.

Have you always wanted to be a writer? What made you decide to become one?

Very, very secretively, yes. As a kid, I read nonstop. I daydreamed in full, detailed stories that I would revise constantly, as if daydreams needed to have a proper plot. I never actually dreamed it could be a career, though. Michael Crichton was a god to me, and he seemed omniscient in a way I didn’t think I was capable of achieving. But over time I came to see I was an autodidact with obsessive research tendencies.

At some point I realized I’d accrued a lot of these stories, along with a fairly unique knowledge set, and that I could weave many into a full novel, the type I wished someone was writing and publishing: a meal with all my favorite flavors of science, action, thrills, mystery, romance, danger. It had been simmering, then two events made Resistant happen. One, a dream of Rory and Navy in a certain scene that happens at the climax of the novel. And two, my husband and I had a dare between us for who could finish the first step towards our most secret aspiration—either he would finish a small piece of furniture, or I would finish the first five chapters of a novel. We had three months. I finished Resistant nine months later.

Who is your favorite character in your book(s)?

Well, Rory is my main character, so I do adore her. But I think I favor Navy, her co-hero, because I find him difficult to get to know. There’s a lot more to learn about him if one could pry his brain open. Fortunately, that’s my task.

Where do you do most of your writing?

Wherever I can find a quiet moment! Family, work, and trying to have a healthy life can both slow you down and feed your imagination. But usually from nine to midnight, and if I can beat everyone awake, during the blue hours of the morning. I love that color of light and the sense that everyone is dreaming on pillows while I’m dreaming on [digital] paper.

What inspires you?

Learning new information, exercise and music inspire me. I read as many scientific and history articles as fiction work, and am constantly saving them to bookmarks so they can inspire a new plot twist. I have a playlist that is curated to the mood of each WIP. It’s the soundtrack to the movie playing in my mind. If I’m stuck, for me, a hike or a long walk to said soundtrack usually bubbles up a new twist or motivates a stuck character. And when I want historical perspective, I love to dig through the New York Public Library’s Digital Collection– if you haven’t been, go, and I advise putting your vacation responder on.

What else would you like your readers to know about you?

I’d probably want my readers to know that I appreciate them. If we ever meet, I hope they’ll say hello, let me buy them a beer, or even cook them some pasta. For reassurance, I would also want them to know I used to cook professionally. It’ll be good.

Tell us a little about your process. Pantser? Plotter? Mixture of both?

Once I sit to write, the pantser takes over. When I am unable to actually type, I try to record my disparate thoughts and needles of “this character is too likeable and needs faults” or “don’t forget to take that gun off the wall soon”. Thank goodness for Google Keep (tm?), while I continue the search for a plot-mapping app that I like.

What are you reading right now?

I’m ashamed to admit how many books. I’m reading Eliot Peper – 2 of his. Just finished Adrienne Young’s Sky in the Deep. Kelli Clare’s Hidden. Andrew Mayne’s Looking Glass. James Scott’s The Kept. The Map of True Places by Brunonia Barry. And re-reading Physick Book of Deliverance Dane by Katherine Howe, That’s the fiction stuff. Maryn McKenna’s Big Chicken is in progress too. As you might imagine, everything moves pretty slowly with that many going on. It’s a recent problem I’ve developed that I’m not sure how to treat.

If you could spend the day with one of your characters, who would it be and what would you do?

AJ, a character who will have a larger role in the sequel, is a fishing captain of her own vessel. I’d love to go on a fishing trip with her off the coast of Woods Hole, MA. Maybe swing into Martha’s Vineyard for a homebrew and pizza at the Offshore Ale Co.

What actor/actress would you like to play the part of your protagonist if your book became a movie/television show?

Rory is in her twenties, so I imagine there are hundreds of talented actors [actresses? Not sure the preferred parlance these days] who could play her. It seems more fun to find an unknown actor with untapped talent! I’m certainly unknown so far. On the other hand, I think Jennifer Lawrence and I share the commonality of a well-educated pirate’s vocabulary and a fondness for a pint.

What are your top 3 favorite books?

So hard to narrow down! I guess I’d say the ones that haunt me most: The Lace Reader, by Brunonia Barry. Wuthering Heights. Jurassic Park.

But if we’re being honest, I confess to rereading Daddy Long Legs. Though fiction, it’s this historical, literal progression of a poor, uneducated orphan from child to a young woman, told through the letters she writes to her benefactor. While it’s outdated and of course today the story would never be so patriarchal, I still like reading how Jerusha overcomes her insecurities through education and faith in her natural skills. Her college education, her social education, are all relayed through such an honest lens, and her destiny is to be a writer. I daydream of writing the modern adaptation.

Do you have any rituals that you practice before sitting down to write?

Music on. That’s all. When I write, I think it’s wise to read a bit of my last writing as well as a random chapter somewhere else. The former refreshes me of where I was headed, and the latter both cuts editing time in the final product and keeps the mood consistent in the overall story.

What do you like to spend time doing when you aren’t writing?

I love to cook with my daughter, and to feed my family and friends. Pasta occupies a steady 1/8thof my daily thoughts. My dogs appreciate a walk, though I don’t always appreciate their addition to mine. I like to have a glass of anything with my husband, who is charming and hilarious and challenges me. I treasure time with my mother, who at 74 is spry and brilliant, especially when she gets sassy. She leads our hiking adventures. I garden for beauty and food, and try to learn what is edible that we all ignore [latest: look for a plant called lamb’s quarters, it’s a weed but the wilder, nuttier version of spinach]. Ask me on Twitter for my fresh Caesar dressing recipe, or anything about pasta.

Here is more about Resistant

Book Cover Resistant

In the final battle with drug-resistant bacteria, one woman’s blood holds a secret weapon. Rory and her father have survived the antibiotic crisis that has killed millions, including Rory’s mother—but ingenuity and perseverance aren’t their only advantages. When a stoic and scarred young military veteran enters their quiet life, Rory is drawn to him against her better judgment . . . until he exposes the secrets her mother and father kept from her, including the fact that her own blood may hold the cure the world needs. Now she is the target of groups fighting to reach it first. When the government comes after Rory, aiming to use her for a cure it can sell to the highest bidder, she’s forced to flee with her father and their new protector. But can she find the new path of human evolution before the government finds her?

Here is more about Rachael:

Rachael Sparks was born in Waco, Texas. She graduated with a degree in microbiology from Texas A&M University and her first college job was ghostwriting a nonfiction science book. After a decade-long career in Austin, Texas, as a transplant specialist, she joined a startup fighting healthcare-acquired infections. After relocating with her husband, young daughter, and mother to Asheville, North Carolina, she finally put her first novel onto the page. In her free time she serves on the board of the Asheville Museum of Science and loves to cook, brew, garden, and spend time with friends and family in between obsessively researching new science concepts, history, or new recipes.

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